Friday, February 17, 2012;

When fear becomes love..
When love becomes fear..

Trying hard not to blow up because it's gonna be his bday in 2 days time.
But somehow, he often do things to piss me off and to disappoint me.
Sometimes i really wonder my significnace to him.
If u say u feel insignificant to me, then what am i?
Strangers get ur care and concern, but what about me?
I get nothing except arguements and accusation.
So much for trying so hard, even to the extent of blaming myself, thinking that i shouldnt be that petty, should have just gave in, should have just bear with whatever shit that comes.
I feel like an idiot.

U say u are sick, u want to rest.
U unwillingly met up with me, giving me the black face because u were sick and tired.
U made me feel as though i was a selfish person
But then, u amazing had the energy to go for mps!
That stupid thing that u told me u wont be going when i asked u not too!
The feeling of betrayal. My trust in u.
Gone, all gone!
Disappointed! Utterly disappointed!
So tell me about signifance! FUCK YOU!

U say, a relationship is not about giving in or giving up, but it's about accepting each other.
But come on, what the fuck can u accept when u argue?
Someone has to fucking give in, and both of u have to try to compromise isnt it?
U give in and compromise precisely because u are able to accept each other..
I suddenly realize that u really dun understand how a relationship works because u dun listen at all.
Yes, i admit, u are a nice guy.
U can be very sweet.
But ur temper sucks, and its sucks big time.
U are too egoistic, u dun listen to others.
U are always right and never in the wrong.
To u, it's a good thing when ur gf fears u.
To u, it's a fucking sense of achievement.

Seriously, I am sick and tired of all these.
Sick of fearing u, sick of arguing with u, sick of being so insignificant.
Never once was i treated like that, so who are u to treat me like this?!

Seriously, I really want to leave..
I just need more time to walk out of this.
One day, i will be able to, and i will.
I will be able to find myself, find the courage and end this once and for all.

I have said this once, but i will say this again.
It's scary how a woman's instinct owards such things can be so accurate..